Join us in Celebration!

December 2, 2007 | 2 Comments

Welcome to the December 2007 Edition of The Calm Space. Can you believe it is December already?

We’re marking this month with Celebration.

Whether you’re celebrating Christmas, or simply getting through the rest of 2007, we have something for you this month.

I am thrilled to introduce Joanna Young as our newest contributor - bring us the Writing Space. Welcome Joanna! This month, Joanna shares how the simple gift of words can help us celebrate and find the “magical blend of anticipation, excitement and gratitude“.

Also in this edition - get the ins and outs of buying a techo gift with Leah (I’ve been hankering after a digital photo frame, so the reviews and tips in the Digital Space are going to turn into hints to hubby). Find out the benefits of making a list - just like Santa - with Angela in the Organising Space. Look at the beauty and meaning in celebration with Annie at the Spiritual Space. Join Chris as she celebrates something a little less festive, but eminently close to her heart at the Relationship Space. Check in with Marj as she shares her picks to help you celebrate in the Reading Space. Then pop on over to the Music Space and share your picks for music to uplift and soothe our souls.

Please take your time. Read. Explore. Leave a comment. Start a conversation.

From all of us here at The Calm Space we wish you a joyous festive celebration - filled with love, laughter and happy times.

The Power of Celebration

The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.

~Oprah Winfrey

We chose our theme of Celebration this month as a way of marking and honouring the end of a year, and the hope that comes with the dawn of a new year. I am encouraging you to see celebration as a way of life - not something we do when we have time, but something that comes naturally and easily, and often.

Aussie Christmas is all about the heat, the sun, the sand and the surf…I feel that celebration is all about honour - and indeed, my dictionary definition for Celebrate agrees with me - “to honour”. We honour the spirit of the season, and we honour those we cherish by showing them how much we care. Despite the commercialism and expectations that are heaped upon us at this time of year, we can each leave our mark by observing this special time of year with ceremony and festivity.

When you put December and Celebration together, most of us think of Christmas. Of tinsel and toys, gifts and games, turkey and trees, pudding and paper, bon bons and egg nog, summer holidays and Christmas parties. And these are all wonderful and joyous. I’m a huge fan of Christmas.

Mark the passing of the year with ceremony and festivity and honour yourself and your loved ones, either quietly or with a burst of fireworks (depending, perhaps, on the type of year you’ve lived through).

Even more than Christmas, however, I’d like to talk about celebrating life. Christmas isn’t the only time of year we can show our love to those we care about. Don’t save it all for special occasions - make every day a special occasion!

As the amazing Oprah so eloquently put it in that quote above, the more we celebrate the more there is to celebrate. The little things are as worthy of celebration as the big. No matter what 2007 delivered to your door - this month we can:

  • celebrate our friends and family
  • celebrate our joys and accomplishments
  • celebrate we have made it through another year safe and healthy
  • celebrate how we’ve made a difference in the lives of others this year
  • celebrate with joy and thanks for all we are and all we have
  • spread the joy and peace of the festive season through the rest of the year

Will you join with me in celebration of being alive! It’s time to envision possibilities and, as Joanna says in the Writing Space, it’s time to celebrate the magical blend of anticipation, excitement and gratitude.

How will you celebrate?

  • use the good china because you feel like it
  • dance to the joy of being alive
  • raise a glass and toast to you
  • turn off the TV and play games with your family
  • feel the joy at the receiving of gifts and compliments
  • relish the giving of gifts with thought and ceremony
  • wave your magic wand
  • write down what you are grateful for, often
  • sing out loud

You’ll find that the more you celebrate, the more you’ll have to celebrate about… and I’ll be here dancing and singing with you during December and right throughout 2008.

Finally, I’d like to celebrate you. I celebrate you for who you are. I celebrate and am grateful for you reading The Calm Space. I celebrate the possibilities opening up for you in 2008.

Merry Christmas from my heart to yours.

Posted by karen | Filed Under December 07, The Space 

We’re Talking about Friendship

November 1, 2007 | Leave a Comment

Welcome to the second edition of The Calm Space. We are all thrilled you have dropped by and would like to thank you for your warm congratulations last month as we launched the beautiful magazine! Your uplifting comments and excited wishes made it all seem so much more special and real to us.

It seems appropriate that this edition we are talking about friendship. I am proud to call each of the contributors to The Calm Space my friend, and believe that is one of the strengths of our team here.

Angela talks about making time for our friends; Marj highlights three very different books about friends and friendship; Annie discusses becoming a friend to yourself first, and the magic in a smile; Chris wonders what friends are for; and Leah keeps in touch the digital way.

This month, we have the excitement of announcing our first ever winner of the monthly prize draw - congratulations to our winner - your copy of Inspired! by Jamie Durie is on it’s way!

Please don’t forget to sign up (if you haven’t already) to be in the draw for our two fabulous prizes this month (designed specifically to bring you some stress relief as Christmas draws closer)!

Thinking about Friendship and Friends

FriendshipsAs I was preparing to write this - and with the theme of friendship firmly front of mind - I attended my daughter’s graduation celebration as she finishes middle school and heads into senior school for her last three years.

As it is an all-girl school, the ceremony was very emotional, and very strongly based on the theme of friendship. (And very different to any ceremony I have attended for my son over the years).

Each girl was given a lovely flower, tied with ribbon as well as their certificate and new pale blue tie. And talking to the girls afterward, the flower (a brightly coloured gerbera) was a very special part of the night - along with all the flowers and hugs they gave their teachers in thanks.

The slide shows each class had put together to celebrate their last three years together showed photos of girls being friends, caring for one another, bonding and growing together.

In her closing remarks, the head girl said “Friends are the bacon bits in the salad of life“.

It brought the house down…

As parents, we know that friendships are vital to our children. We know that how they feel about school and their family and life in general is all seen through the window of their friends. Without friends, life is colourless and drab.

As we grow into adulthood, we get busier and busier. Our relationships, our family and our work commitments start to take over. Until one day we realise that we haven’t made time for our friends in a while. And that somehow, even with everything else that fills our life (all that striving, and working, and loving, and caring…) we need our friends.

Girlfriends are:

  • Our benchmark that we’re not going crazy
  • Our safety valve to vent without repercussions
  • Our mentors to show us the way
  • Our shoulder to cry on
  • Our cheer squad
  • Our rock of understanding
  • Our inspiration by the lives they live
  • Our motivation that there is a better way
  • Our belief that we, too, can get through this
  • Our reality check when things get out of hand
  • Our light when we don’t know which way is up
  • Our mirror that reflects our soul back at us, with feeling

With secure, happy friendships, we become strong and able to go out and face whatever the world throws at us - knowing that someone has our back and someone loves and believes in us.

The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it’s the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when he discovers that someone else believes in him and is willing to trust him with his friendship.
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Girlfriends help us work out who we are. And help us to stand tall and look life in the eye.

What would you think if I sang out of tune,
Would you stand up and walk out on me.
Lend me your ears and I’ll sing you a song,
And I’ll try not to sing out of key.
I get by with a little help from my friends,
I get high with a little help from my friends,
Going to try with a little help from my friends.

 

~ The Beatles

This month, as we head into the busyness that is the festive season, let’s make time for our friends and remember how very important they are to us - individually and collectively!

Kristine Carlson puts it so well in Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff for Women: “Friendships, especially with your girlfriends, are to be cherished. … cut your friends some slack, and (don’t) hold them to impossible expectations and standards, especially when they are having a bad day. Sometimes we get so close to our friends that it’s easy to forget that they are just human - like we are.”

How will you show your friends how much they mean to you? Can you cut them some slack. Appreciate them. Honour and cherish them. Offer to take their turn at the car pool. Drop a simple dinner around. Bake a cake. Remember their birthday. Ask how they are and then wait for the answer.

Friendship is a living thing that lasts only as long as it is nourished with kindness, empathy and understanding. (anon)

Posted by karen | Filed Under November07, The Space 

A Fresh Start

October 1, 2007 | 3 Comments

This month, we’re making a fresh start – a bold new beginning.

A fresh start brings to mind thoughts of newness, of turning over a new leaf, creating a new habit or a new way of living. Making new friends, escaping, renovating, or simply looking at something from a different angle.

And that is what we have done here with A Calm Space.

We have renovated, tossed the clutter, changed our name and from the ashes of the old (Sanctuary) comes something bright, beautiful and very, very special to us.

Each month, we’ll welcome you with a special theme – something that inspires us and drives us to share with you.

Our first topic of the month is A Fresh Start.

A change of season, especially the change from winter to spring, makes us think about fresh starts, doesn’t it?

Spring is my favourite time of year. It’s like the whole world wakes up and starts to move again. We shake off the heaviness of winter – not only the heavy clothes, but the general feeling of needing warmth and comfort – and put on a lighter outlook. Fresher somehow to match the season. It’s like our blood starts to flow faster, easier – giving us a surge of energy and enthusiasm for life.

As the weather warms, we throw open the windows and invite the breeze into our homes to freshen, liven, and renew the space in which we live.

As we throw our quilts on the clothesline to air, we are also throwing the doors to our heart open to the newness that surrounds us.

What does ‘a fresh start’ mean to you?

A fresh start can mean that huge, life changing decision. The sea change, the start or end of a relationship, the resignation, or the creation of a new business. Yes, these changes are definitely in the ‘fresh start’ category.

I found out this week that dear friends of ours are selling up everything and taking off for a round the world motorbike tour – their bikes are on order and due to arrive before Christmas. They may never return. Now, that is a fresh start!

If it is something you have been dreaming of for so long, then maybe the time is right. Leave the hustle and bustle of the city and take over that vineyard in the Margaret River; that bed & breakfast in Tuscany or that charter boat business in the Whitsunday Islands.

But sometimes, while the dreams are there in your heart, you are content for them to stay dreams just a while longer (say, until the kids have finished school). Sure, you’ll dream, you’ll plan, you’ll collect information. But you’re not quite ready for the dramatic change just at this moment.

Spring madness hasn’t got you that far in its grip.

There are many smaller ways of making a fresh start. Ways that won’t completely disrupt our whole life. Ways that are certainly easier on the wallet and our stress levels.

Spring is a great time to start new habits. There is something in the air – that freshness and enthusiasm – that helps us keep at something new until it becomes a habit.

A lot of people start a new exercise routine – going for a walk each day is certainly a lot more pleasurable now than it was in the dark cold of a winter’s morn. Sure, there is also the panic about getting into a swimsuit as summer lurks just around the corner… but that is not what we are talking about.

We’re talking about something deeper – something that is more about who you are than about how you look.

Who you are reflects your whole life. And what better time is there than Right Now to take a fresh peek at who you are and who you are becoming each day.

Making a fresh start can be as simple as seeing yourself from a distance and recognising that there are little tweaks to be made to how you perceive yourself and how you think.

One useful way of doing this is to sit quietly somewhere and become a movie director for a short while.

Pick a few different scenes in the movie called – Your Life. Those scenes that represent the many roles you play. Rerun the movie of your day at work, your time with the kids yesterday afternoon, how you were with your partner last night, and how you are when you’re alone. Run each movie separately, and watch yourself with dispassionate eyes – like you are watching a movie on your television set.

Who do you see? Is it the same person in each scene? Or are you putting on a different hat and a different attitude as you move from take to take? Do you like the lead character?

Who does that lead character in your movie need to be, in order for you to like them and be really proud of them?

Who do you need to be to add that sparkle of ‘star quality’?

What action can you take today to give yourself a fresh start?

“There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom” ~Anaïs Nin

Posted by karen | Filed Under October07, The Space 

April 07 - The Space

July 29, 2007 | Leave a Comment

Everyone needs a little bit of calm to restore their batteries and renew their spirit.

The more deliberate we are in crafting a sanctuary – a retreat – a way of renewal – the more benefit we receive in our busy lives.

Our lives are so busy, so chock full of activity, it is sometimes hard to get enough of what restores us. We all seek an equilibrium, where the draining influences of busyness and stress and giving to others are counterbalanced by those activities or places or people that fill us back up.

Sanctuary can be found on many levels.

We can find sanctuary in a spa – wallowing in treatments and indulgences that restore not only our body but our spirit as well.

We can find sanctuary in our homes – a home that has been consciously created with retreat and renewal in mind can be like taking a deep, deep breath as we arrive home after a busy day.

We can find sanctuary in nature – at the beach, trekking through the bush, or sitting in our own little piece of nature in our backyard or on our verandah. Sometimes it is enough to find a park bench on which to sit and feel the sun and the gentle breeze on our face, to find the strength to go on.

We can find our sanctuary in the privacy of our bathrooms – nothing beats a good soak with a beautiful scent to soothe away the stresses and help us relax.

We can find sanctuary in the company of our family, in the laughter of good friends, in participation in a team sport, or in the arms of the one we love.

We can find our sanctuary just by having some quiet, alone time.

So, where do you find your sanctuary?

This month in Sanctuary we’re talking about creating sanctuary – restoring body, mind and soul so that we are able to cope with anything life throws us with calm and grace.

In The Reading Space, Marj again shares two great books on creating sanctuary; I share with you one of my all-time favourite albums in The Music Space; in the Career Space we briefly discuss the concept of finding respite in the workplace; and in the Guest Space, Angela again joins us talking about creating your own little corner of the world…

I’m thrilled to introduce you to our third new regular contributor for Sanctuary – Chris Owen. Anyone who has been around a little while will have heard me talk about Chris, as she is a dear friend, a colleague and THE woman to turn to for talk about relationships – the intimate kind and the business kind.

This month, Chris shares with us some possibilities for creating sanctuary in our personal relationships. I love how she asks a series of questions that alert us to what is possible in a relationship – and that she helps us realise that we need more than one person (even if our spouse is truly wonderful – like mine:) to satisfy those needs in our life.

Please join me in welcoming Chris – we’re thrilled to have you on board!! Chris…

~~~~

If sanctuary can be found in the company of those we love, who is your sanctuary?

Who in your world provides you with a safe haven? Who is your harbour, where the beating waves can be kept at bay?

Who understands you with little or no explanation? Who accepts you just as you are, warts and all? Who loves you with your erratic bits, your neurotic bits, your quirky bits, your endearing bits?

Who can you tell the unappealing “stuff” to? Who can you reveal your mistakes to? Where is it safe to go to reveal just how badly you stuffed up? When you tell them, you’ll survive them telling you that you’ve been dumb - but know also they’ll still be determinedly on your side and ready to fight beside you if necessary?

Who’ll just listen and only ask for the details if they think you’re ready to give them? Who’ll help you work out what to do next so you can leave the harbour without feeling the waves are swamping you? Who’ll remind you of how successfully you hurdled the last problem, and rebuild your battered confidence?

Who’ll pour a glass of wine or hand you a beer? Or know that it’s better to give you a cuppa this time? Who’ll offer you their best chocolate, or make you a meal, or invite you to stay for dinner?

Who will distract you from the chaos for a while with some entertaining stories that allow your brain to rest a bit? Who’ll send you a card to tell you they love you and/or appreciate you, just because they thought you might need it? Who’ll send you an email joke that somehow puts the world back into perspective?

Who’ll give you a hug when you feel unlovable? Who’ll offer the soothing rub to your shoulders, or the foot massage?

Rarely does all this come in one package and if it does for you, then you probably have a fantastic relationship with someone. There aren’t many people who’ll give you all of that unless you’re giving to them in THEIR time of need, and being their safe harbour in return.

But just because it’s not wrapped up in one package doesn’t mean you can’t find sanctuary. You may just need to be selective. When the waves seem sky-high, you just need to choose the safe harbour that’ll fit the problem of the moment.

And if, after reading this, you’ve realized you don’t have ANYONE, then it’s really time to take action.

The first step is to start selecting who amongst your lover, friends, and family, are ripe candidates. Start loving them authentically by offering THEM some of these gifts. It’s amazing what comes back in return!

Chris Owen
Pink Apple Connections

Posted by leah | Filed Under April07, The Space 

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